Master the art of a sit down

A sit down is just another way of saying a meeting.  A sit down is probably the best way to get some issues out on the table and get them resolved.  Some teams have way too many sit downs and some don’t have enough.  

Here are some tips to a sit down.  

Whatcha talking bout?

If you going to call a sit down, you better know what your calling it for.  What are the clear issues.  Not what you think are the issues, and definitely not what someone who’s not even going to be there thinks the issues are. 

Get a clear picture of what’s going on before the sit down.  You might find there is no issue at all, some trouble maker (they normally do this more than once) is making mountains out of mole hills. Make sure everyone knows what the meeting is about before the meeting. 


No ganging up
Nothing is going to get resolved if you plan to gang up on one person either.  It's just not scriptural. Invite only individuals involved. Stay away from sit downs that just want to accuse and point fingers. You know let's blame Sister Sassy for everything. Let's recognize it's not what people can do, can't do, have done, won't do, will do  - its about what God can do with people, to people and through people.  Correction without the Cross is condemnation and it's the worse kind of sit down. 

Quit Stalling

Get to it quick, no stalling at a sit down. With a little humilty you might look across the table and realize their time is way more valuable than yours.   A sit down is about finding the solution, nothing more.  No need to chase down every rabbit in the church. Start out with prayer, Lord knows a lot of sit downs could be avoided entirely just by praying over the issue first. 

Speak when you have to not when you want to

“Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he holds his tongue.” Solomon

The words you say don’t make you smart.  Whenever I’m going in feeling intimidated and outgunned, I keep my mouth tight and my ears open.  In resolving conflict I find that more conflict can be avoided by putting a filter on the mouth.  No need to have another sit down about the last sit down. 

Be respectful

Disrespect of any kind is out of the question.  I don’t care how bad you are treated, what names you are called and how many fingers are pointing at you.  Disrespect is off the table.  The moment a hint of disrespect is out you are done!  Let me say that another way, you are much harder to defend when you are disrespectful. 

 I have a little acronym that helps me even decide if I do a sit down or not. It also prepares me for the sit down. It’s N.E.E.D.

Is it Necessary?

Is it Edifying?

Is it Encouraging?

Is it Dignified?

If I can’t get legitimate answers to those questions then the sit down is out of the question. 

Q4U:  What other tips do you have for sit downs?